How To Manage Eye Contact

Beautiful-EyeThe first problem with eye contact is that we all know that it is A Good Thing which we should all practise, but we don’t know how to do it without looking and feeling awkward and just a bit creepy.

The second problem is that we all know a little bit about how eye contact works, just enough to nudge each other and say things like, ‘Did you notice, no eye contact? Shifty or what!’ ‘Never trust anyone who looks you straight in the eye. I read that somewhere.’

And so we make instant judgements without checking the accuracy of our perceptions, while hoping that our own mismanaged signals will be correctly interpreted.

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Walk Like A Winner — Walking With Confidence And Authority

balance2We all know how to walk, right? It’s easy. You just put one foot in front of the other and you get to where you’re going. Well, yes, up to a point. But when you enter a room or a building, when you walk around your place of work, people are forming an impression of you just by observing the way you move. If you want to make a positive professional impact, walk like a winner.

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How To Speak With Authority And Impact

speech1The way you speak is central to the impact you make. You can develop a way of speaking which adds to your professional presence and which places you in the category of people who make an impact and should be taken seriously.

Here are five steps to using your voice to create a positive impression.

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How Being Nice Harms You

nice1We all know that ‘nice’ is an overworked word, one we use when we are unable to or can’t be bothered to come up with something more precise.

But we need to watch out if ‘nice’ is often applied to us by ourselves or other people.

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How to Be a Better Friend — Accepting Feelings

femalefriends2Of course you accept your mate’s feelings, you may think, as you recall all the hours you spend listening to their emotional traumas about their significant other, or lack thereof, or their mother or their boss or their kids or their diet…

You do what all good friends do. You listen. But really good friends listen without imposing their own agenda.

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Thumbs down to ‘Awkward Turtle’— How to handle awkward situations in better ways

thumbs1‘Awkward Turtle’ is one of those urban slang expressions with which only the tragically unhip (you too?) are unfamiliar. It refers to a movement in which you place one hand over the other and rotate your thumbs, presumably imitating a turtle trying to get out of an awkward position.

It can be used in a group situation, when someone puts their foot in it, says the wrong thing, doesn’t realise something significant about a group member, and so on.

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Female and email mean never having to say Just Not Sorry

email1The new Chrome app Just Not Sorry is aimed specifically at helping women check the emails they are sending to highlight weak or filler words and phrases.

It’s a useful enough business tool but it’s something of a shame (see what I did there?) that the app focuses on women, and that the debates which it has sparked replay familiar ideas about women’s behaviour and position in the workplace.

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The One Word You Need to Reduce Christmas Stress

Christmasstress1It’s meant to be a season of peace and goodwill. Cue hollow laugh.

For many of us, the first sighting of a red and white Santa, usually around the end of August, marks the onset of low-level creeping anxiety, which builds up into full-on stressed-out panic as we approach the final days.

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How to Deal With People Who Manipulate You

puppeteer1Emotional manipulation comes in many shapes and forms.

You might experience the occasional twinge of unease when you realise that someone is pulling your strings. You might find yourself uncomfortably caught in a personal or professional relationship which is defined by the power imbalance created by the use of manipulation.

The manipulators in your life might be family members or friends, or they might be colleagues who may or may not be senior to you at work. What they have in common is a desire to control your behaviour.

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How to Manage Perfectionism

perfect1In some situations, perfectionist behaviour works. Close, excruciating attention to criteria and standards is essential in contexts which involve, for example, people’s lives.

You don’t want your surgeon to execute a cut which is ‘near enough’ the right place, or the person controlling your flight to tell the pilot not to worry if they can’t climb.

In our everyday personal and professional lives, however, perfectionism is not only unnecessary, but can also be damaging.

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